what i want
i want everyone who has never had a horrible disease or cancer to undertake chemo. see how YOU feel watching every moment of your life - and being sleepy - and being sick. and i hope you ENJOY waking up at 2:00 am and staying that way for 10 - 12 hours, exhausted but unable to sleep. and i hope you LIKE eating every 2 - 3 days.
i want you to hurt like i do because that’s the only way you’re going to learn. or not. maybe you’re so self-obsessed that nothing can hurt you, and you think you’re immune to everything that is less than how you see it to be: perfect in your mind.
I want you to hurt like i do.
i want you to hurt.
and facebook people (i hate “peeps”), notice how the beginning of this blog post resembles a facebook post? well it’s because there is not one piece of software or ria that i can find that will handle it all. soon…but not now.
i’m gonna go snuggle littler dog.
sorry baby…
Comment by Sticky — June 7, 2009 @ 9:54 pm
I wish you were still over here and none of it ever happened to you, where is that F#@*ING genie, when you need him?
Comment by James in Raleigh — June 11, 2009 @ 7:08 pm
ily
Comment by Brandee — June 13, 2009 @ 9:43 pm
i think this may be the first-ever angry post i’ve read from you and all i’m saying is go you:) angry is okay. all the shit we feel is okay to feel. feeling it and expressing all this is better than the denial that so many people employ when sick.
i didn’t realize you were still in chemo:( thought just radiation. and the appetite? can i send you some of my favorite party brownies to help? i’m glad you have your doggie to snuggle with. thinking of you. xoxox
Comment by stephanie diane green — June 16, 2009 @ 3:40 pm
thinking of you…knowing and yet not knowing how much this really sucks………..
glad to hear there is a full time dog in your life……right?
mary
Comment by Mary — June 22, 2009 @ 8:49 am
It hurts to read your words and realize how much you hurt. It pains me and I wish I could do something to replace all this badness with lots of goodness.
Being helpless when someone wonderful like you is hurting is one life’s “EPIC Suck situations” and feels like crap.
I’m so sorry and send all my love and prayers to you and littler dog.
e.
Comment by Emma — June 22, 2009 @ 4:50 pm
?? ????? ??? ?????……
i want everyone who has never had a horrible disease or cancer to undertake chemo…..
Trackback by Alex Gordon — April 4, 2010 @ 3:32 am