(please excuse the minimal number of characters that require the shift or caps lock key to be used. the hands aren’t cooperating.
before the SHTF situation yesterday (and, yes, AW, what i’m being put through is a true, real life, more likely to happen than major disaster SHTF situation than those things you and the WOGgie Doggies muse about - think about that and act and plan accordingly - seriously - because if anything ever happens to you your parents will do the same thing to you - they’re all cut from the same cloth, after all) and when i was still feeling happy and content with life, i ran out to fred meyer to pick up some supplies (more milk - i should just get this delivered instead of having to replenish every three days) and some things on the “need to buy” list (which is comprised of those things i either can’t buy online or don’t make sense to buy online). these little trips always amuse me in so many ways because of the “human condition” variables involved. some of the “variables” i encountered during that 2-hour trip were:
(1) a twentysomething guy ripping apart the racks of u-dub branded sports gear - and pulling out tee-shirts and other lightweight items of clothing. by the time he was done he had a good 20 items in his basket;
(2) a thirtysomething mummy with two little ones in tow trying to maneuver the ridiculously sized “play cart” (a shopping cart that looks like a mini-castle, is made of plastic and offers a “play area” that’s as large as the grocery holding area) through the aisles of the clothing section - and bonking it (and, subsequently, the children) into everything - and knocking clothes off of racks and shoes off of shelves and people out of the way . i’m so sure there’s a reason why these stupid play carts exist - and i’m so sure there’s a reason why they have to be half the size of my car - and i’m so sure there’s a reason why children need to be wheeled around stores in them. the poor mum was trying so hard to control the thing and, i think, realising it was a dumb idea to try to push something that outweighed her and was 4′ wide through the teeny tiny aisles.
(3) various store employees trying to unbox and put up stock while also dealing with the “back to school sale” saturday shoppers.
I managed *not* to get my toes run over by other shoppers’ carts - which is a good thing because shopping carts + slippered, neuropathy riddled feet = sure and blinding pain.
and speaking of slippers, not only did i have to buy another pair - but i had to put them on right in the store. (i was completely out of footwear that fit - this is one bad treatment month.) i have a really stylish pair of tan mocs now. guys size 10. they’re smexy. (excuse my while i go clean up the puddle of sarcasm that just fell out of my mouth.
a few months ago i purchased a book written by a performance artist that is based on grocery lists she’s found in random places around la. she created personae to go along with these lists - and, with the help of a photographer, “made human” the shoppers she thought would be associated with the found lists. i wonder what she would do with this:
(1) file folders;
(2) gloves;
(3) slippers;
(4) jewellery box;
(5) pens;
(6) candle torch;
(7) milk;
(8) immune boost.
of the entire list, the only thing with any “fun factor” is the jewellery box i chose. it’s actually a lockable pencil box, black metal with silver metal tab corners, padded with felt and with a few mesh pockets. it works well for the intended purpose and looks cool to boot. i looks like a mini lighting case.
i also ended up with some cheapo workout camis. they’re a size medium and way too big around my 32 (c cup - just so you guys don’t think i’m built like a 10 year old) inch chest - but i can get them over the power port without them getting stuck on it and sending me into a fit of pain and a barrage of swearing. of course the purpose of spandex (which is what they’re made of) is totally lost here, but it works and provides at least a bit of support.
the most exciting purchase is the one i’m wearing now, though. it’s froggy jammie bottoms - sky blue with with antifreeze green happy smilie froggies, black-centered white daisies and black, green and white circles. they make me want to jump up and down and do the pogo. alas, that’s not a option. by jump number three i’d be attached to the ceiling by my overly-strong finger nails and not have any way of getting down.
oh and i ended up with some diabetic socks - little ped type things that are padded enough to cushion my pained feet and have no elastic in them - so no pressure on the swelling. now i’m not sure if these things would be useful at all if it weren’t for the swelling - but right now they’re just right. besides fred meyer was having a “buy two get one free” sale so they were cheap. they’re no where near as cool and fun as the katy sockies (which make me do the happy dance in my mind every time i put them on) - but they’re not meant to be. they serve a single purpose; nothing more. when all is said and done they’ll make nice dust mitts.
when i finally made it over to the dairy aisle yesterday, i ran into a crowd of people in scooters with crutches contained in the back baskets. it was surreal. picture 10+ people in scooters all zoom-zooming through the dairy section totally not caring about the rest of us and making us jump out of their respective ways. ‘a group of visitors from a rehab facility, maybe? or a hidden camera vignette for a tv show? regardless, it was curious. but they really should require the folks that drive those things to have to pass some sort of drivers safety test. or at least prove to them “this is not a toy” by showing them what could happen if they drive one of their 350+ pound (inclusive of body weight) scooters over someone. ‘not, of course, that they’d care, though. it’s been my experience that people who drive those scooters have little respect for lives other than their own. (did i ever tell you about the time when i was living in white rock and one of the seniors in a scooter chased a child down the canned goods aisle while his poor mother stood on and watched with a look of total terror on her face? i managed to grab the kid and scoop him up and out of the way just before crazy scooter senior lady ran him down. she did manage to hit him. his mum was so happy and thanked me repeatedly. crazy scooter senior lady saw me in a different aisle a while later and cursed me out. something about how children shouldn’t be allowed to be in the grocery without being in a cart seat. the boy was about 6 or so, mind you.)
now no trip to the grocery is complete without some bitching out the cashier. yesterday was no exception:
Cashier to woman in front of me: “Hello. How are you? Did you find everything alright?”
Woman in front of me: “No. Not that I ever do when I come here. There’s never anyone here to help. I don’t know why I bother.”
She went on to mutter about the store’s lack of employees for the duration of her check-out.
At this point it should be made know that, if anything, Fred Meyer has too many employees about and there to help. And not even do they answer your questions about products’ locations - they take you to them.
Le sigh.
Human condition. Who people are. What they do. Why they do it. How they do it. Two hours in an early saturday afternoon at Fred Meyer will give you so much insight. And it’s cheaper than a college-level class. Usually.
So with yesterday and the most of today done i am, once more, in the happy zone. i spent time with friends. i spent time enjoying the perfect afternoon (80 degrees and pure blue sky). i spent time in the routine that works for me. and i have new froggie jammie bottoms.
a yummy veggie and fresh mozzarella naan pizza is in the works for dinner (despite the fact naan tastes just horrible to me - if i cover it with enough sauce, veggies and mozzarella i can mask it enough to make it less annoying). a smoothie will be the late night snack. with protein powder and supplements to supplement.
pleasures.
(simple)
and smilie froggy jammie bottoms!!!
(and more so)
